I got liquidated. This wave of decline has wiped out the over one million yuan I accumulated over nine years. I’ve been lying awake since dawn, unable to sleep all night. From anxiety and tension to now feeling completely lost and at a loss. I’ve decided to write down my experience while this feeling still lingers, and I finally understand why some older brothers used to share their liquidation stories. Over one million yuan may not be enough to impress the big shots, but for someone like me who started from scratch, it’s a huge loss. It’s incredibly painful. Below is my experience over these years.

In 2017, I first got involved through a friend, who introduced me to mining rigs. I took out a loan of 100,000 yuan to invest in someone else’s mining farm, mining until 2020. Back then, the market was unpredictable, often fluctuating between good and bad. Many times, I had to sell coins to pay electricity bills. Cash flow was tight, but watching the BTC in my account gradually increase was very rewarding—there was a real sense of steady accumulation. At that time, I didn’t understand how to trade futures, only knew how to slowly accumulate spot holdings.

Later, the environment changed, and mining became a thing of the past. With my initial capital, I mostly kept it untouched, and started trading with some of my funds. That was the beginning of my downfall—I entered the futures market. Because I managed my positions well, I survived the “3/12” crash in 2020, when many big players lost everything. I vividly remember OneKey’s big loss; I still hold four OneKey wallets, and it seemed they suffered heavy losses at that time. Meanwhile, I held on tightly despite the nearly 50% drop in prices, maintaining my bottom line. Later, I traded small positions and even made a small profit. I also survived the “5/19” crash in 2021, holding onto my gains amid chaos. The most difficult period was 2022-2023, when I mostly held spot. At that time, I still believed BTC was the future and kept dollar-cost averaging.

Until 2024, just before the market started to turn, I had accumulated nearly 2 BTC over seven years. In many people’s eyes, I am now an “OG” in this circle, a long-term player who understands the survival game well.

II. But everything is a trap of greed

In April 2024, the market was booming. When my account balance broke through 1 million yuan, my mindset subtly changed. I was no longer satisfied with BTC’s slow gains. I started to think that, with my experience, leveraging futures could help me leapfrog to the next level soon. However, the volatility in 2024 far exceeded expectations. High leverage reduced my principal from 1 million to 500,000 yuan. I even went short on TRB at the exchange rate, nearly losing 1 BTC. The anxiety to recover my losses plunged me into internal conflict—I kept thinking about getting back to that 1 million account value. Little did I know, my nightmare was far from over.

III. Deadly obsession: 10/11 event and tonight’s final blow

The “10/11 event” became the final trigger. During that intense fluctuation, I lost another 250,000 yuan in an instant. I traded many altcoins and memes, hitting bottom at absurd prices. But instead of stepping back to reflect, I chose the most dangerous action: bottom-fishing. I frantically gathered information, trying to find a foothold for my obsession. I told myself:

- ETF institutions are present: those billion-dollar giants won’t let the market collapse.
- Insider info: rumors say whale Garrett’s position is still holding firm, so I believed this was the bottom.

I not only held large BTC positions but also various altcoins. For three months, I lived in a daze, constantly watching the charts. Every minute’s fluctuation tugged at my nerves. At 3 a.m., I’d wake up startled by price alerts, staring at the screen with fear, anxiety, and even physical symptoms of stress.

IV. The end: zeroing out and the disappearance of seven years

Last night’s sharp decline was the final judgment. I imagined countless rebound scenarios but never left room for a stop-loss. When that cold liquidation message popped up, I was too exhausted to cry. Instead, I felt lost—what should I do now? From 1 million to 500,000, then 250,000, and now, this is where I stand. It’s not just wealth evaporating; it’s a complete negation of all my efforts, late nights, anxiety, and persistence over the past seven years. I realized that in front of this market, seven years of experience are useless against greed and leverage—they are uncontrollable.

After a sleepless night of reflection, I understand why many brothers who faced liquidation in the past have shared their painful stories as warnings to newcomers:

Leverage is the devil: No matter how long you’ve been in the market or how well you think you understand it, once you trade futures, you’ve handed your life over to volatility. Don’t trade futures! Don’t trade futures! Don’t trade futures!

Don’t try to “recover losses”: Most liquidations stem from the desire to make back what was lost. Once you have that thought, your trading behavior becomes distorted.

Beware of “Bitcoin” and “insider info”: In extreme liquidity crises, ETF institutions and whales will also cut losses. Don’t treat others’ positions as your indicators.

I deeply understand the feeling of lying in bed, heart pounding, yet feeling powerless. I entered the market in 2017, but ended up with nothing. I might disconnect from the internet for a few days, go outside, and feel the real world’s wind and sunshine—things that don’t require reading K-lines to enjoy.

After finishing this article, I will never trade futures again. The pain has reached my bones. As long as you trade futures, next time something goes wrong, it will definitely happen again.

This article is a summary of my nine-year journey in the crypto world. I now have only about 1,500 USD left in OKEX. I don’t know where to start over from here. A deep sense of helplessness.