What is it like to come from a family with low awareness and severe mental exhaustion?

For example, in our family, after working hard all year, we come home for the New Year. Using water to go to the bathroom is criticized, told that it’s wasteful and why not use foot-washing water instead. After meals, using paper to wipe your mouth is also criticized, saying it’s wasteful and that a towel should be used. Waking up too late in the morning, being told that at your age, you’re still so lazy, how can you live like this.
Our two kids make the house a mess; they say you don’t clean up at all, just sit around playing on your phone.
Clothes are directly thrown into the washing machine, and they say it’s too dirty for the washer to clean, it has to be hand-washed.
Buying a new piece of clothing is criticized as wasting money, better to buy cheap street vendor goods for a few dozen yuan.
Anyway, there’s not a single good word to be said to you.
During the New Year, our family never has a peaceful moment. Every time, it’s a quarrel over trivial matters. Thinking to myself, just endure it during the big holiday, but she keeps nagging. I can’t hold back and retort, then she says I don’t respect elders.
A word of advice to adults: always remember one point — when you have your own family, you must stay away from your parents and have boundaries. Living with parents long-term makes conflicts inevitable. These conflicts are unavoidable and stem from differences in thinking and personality.